Q&A

Adam Carolla was cranky yesterday, which means he went on a twenty-three minute tirade about Mexican immigrants.  He says that the problems in the LA educational system aren't due to bad schools or bad teachers, they're due to bad parents - specifically, Mexican parents.  He makes a convincing argument that if the parents don't care how the kid does in school, the kid is probably going to fail, but its a whole other ball of wax, whether Mexicans are more likely to be "bad parents" with regards to schooling; at any rate, I'll tackle Carolla from another angle, just so he can't play the "don't play the race card" card.

 There's the thinking cap, then there's the "anti-immigration cap", which is not so much the hat itself as the angle at which its worn.

The thing about Carolla is that he's a professional complainer;  he's good at finding problems, but bad at finding solutions.  How exactly does he think the government can fix "bad parents"?  Here are a few ideas of my own:

• Post the kids' grades on a societal refridgerator, but replace the names of the kids with the names of the parents.  This will shame the parents into shaming the kids.
• If your kid doesn't get good grades, you can't go out on the weekend. 
• We're taking the car away.

Here are a few of the ideas that Carolla has proposed himself, on this specific podcast and others:

• No more free-lunches for school children.  He thinks giving the poor kids free food encourages the parents to be lazy, if we stopped giving handouts, it would somehow force the parents to care.  This is an idea he proposed on some older podcasts, but not this one.  There's a real hypocrisy:  in the present he says we need to save kids from "bad parents", but in the past he said "bad parents" will magically give a shit if we stop saving their kids.  The only thing consistent about The Aceman is that he doesn't want the government spending his money, not on schools and teachers, and not on free lunches.
• No more fucking in these ghettoes and having too many goddamn kids.  This is something he said on this podcast and also in the past; in the aftermath of the Haiti Earthquake, he said a big part of the problem was that there were too many people down there, and that we need to "thin the herd".  He says no one's allowed to talk about this because then you get accused of being a racist - listen, Aceman the reason you get accused of racism is because you use cattle metaphors while talking about  population control on a specific race, even Hitler would have found that impolitic.  The thing is, there are tons of people who not only talk about overpopulation, they take action to prevent it; these people are called liberals, and they want to provide sex education, condoms, and access to abortion, not just to minorities but to trash of all colors.  Politically correct liberals are not the problem, they're the answer; the people you need to cull from the herd are the conservative wackjobs who try to prevent sex education.  That would be called a "final solution".

At one point, he goes off on a tangent about how, if your kid needs an emergency appendectomy, or if you need your tonsils out, you don't go to Tijuana, you go to San Deigo.  Why he asks?  "Because America is the best."  Actually, the reason is because in America, we have government regulations that prevent bad doctors from opening up shop, Ace doesn't want to admit that fact because he'd look like a hypocrite for complaining about all the "bullshit building codes" that make it a hassle when he's trying to add the Nth addition onto his mansion.

Near the end, Donny asks "What is The Left's ultimate plan?"  Before he can even get the question out, Ace shouts "THEY DON'T HAVE AN ULTIMATE PLAN...Their plan is this....'I don't want to ask any tough questions, and I don't want to point any fingers.'"

Here's a tough question for you, Carolla:  as a libertarian, how do you propose that we control the individual, how do we force these parents to better raise their kids without creating a totalitarian state?  You'll spend half an hour complaining about a parking ticket, what would you do if they wrote you up for talking about farting in your daughter's face or getting a boner while wrestling with your son?

For whatever reason, I always end up forgiving the Aceman; the greater question is, how do I forgive myself?  I point the finger and place the blame squarely on my own sorry ass for continuing to listen to this guy.